Perspective

Perspective

How can two people be in the same place at the same time and come away with different memories of the events that took place?

“It is a feature of human memory that we do not store information exactly as it is presented to us.  Rather, people extract from information the gist, or underlying meaning. In other words, people store information in the way that makes the most sense to them.” [1]

“There are no facts, only interpretations.” 
― Friedrich Nietzsche

We bring so much baggage with us wherever we go. None of us is a blank slate, able to interpret the events that occur around us with complete objectivity. Some are predisposed to certain viewpoints without perceptions even passing through the scrutiny of critical thinking.

“Some people see the glass half full. Others see it half empty.
I see a glass that's twice as big as it needs to be.” 
― George Carlin

We generally give ourselves the benefit of the doubt. We normally ascribe the best of motives to our every action. How our actions are perceived by those on whom they have an affect is usually swept aside as nonsense. It is easy to rationalize why we do what we do and behave as we behave and expect everyone else to understand.

“The world is a tragedy to those who feel, but a comedy to those who think.” 
― Horace Walpole

What should we do if our words or actions are interpreted in a way that another feels is hurtful?

"Therefore all things whatsoever ye would that men should do to you, do ye so to them." Matthew 7:12

“In all affairs it's a healthy thing now and then to hang a question mark on the things you have long taken for granted.” 
― Bertrand Russell

“We make sense of information by trying to fit it into schemas, which are a way of organizing information.  Schemas are mental 'units' of knowledge that correspond to frequently encountered people, objects or situations.  They allow us to make sense of what we encounter in order that we can predict what is going to happen and what we should do in any given situation.  These schemas may, in part, be determined by social values and therefore prejudice.” [2]

“Some people grumble that roses have thorns; I am grateful that thorns have roses.” 
― Alphonse Karr

Sometimes our schemas cause our eyes to be closed to the reality that is before us.

“It is a narrow mind which cannot look at a subject from various points of view.” 
― George Eliot, Middlemarch: A Study of Provincial Life

“No two persons ever read the same book.” 
― Edmund Wilson

I could take this a step further and state that if I read a book today that I had read 20 years ago, it would not be the same book to me because I will have brought to my reading a whole new depth of experiences to relate to the writing. 

“The question is not what you look at, but what you see.” 
― Henry David Thoreau

We make decisions easier on ourselves with hueristics, or 'rules of thumb,' which are cognitive strategies we have developed in the face of data overload.

Hueristic Definition:  A heuristic is a mental shortcut that allows people to solve problems and make judgments quickly and efficiently. These rule-of-thumb strategies shorten decision-making time and allow people to function without constantly stopping to think about the next course of action. While heuristics are helpful in many situations, they can also lead to biases. [3]



Be open to and SEEK the perspective of others

and your own reality will be enlarged.

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[1] http://www.simplypsychology.org/eyewitness-testimony.html

[2] http://www.simplypsychology.org/eyewitness-testimony.html

[3] http://psychology.about.com/od/hindex/g/heuristic.htm

Personal Resolve - Living Your Beliefs

Do you have a personal list of things you will NEVER do or ALWAYS do?

It's like having a personal mission statement. Everything in your life will fall into a category and can be easily dealt with.

If you know certain things that you will NOT bend on, it will make future decisions EASY. You won't have to labor over decisions if you have a personal resolve. It can be likened to a belief system. If you live in accordance with what you believe in your heart, you will be balanced and live a whole, full life without guilt.

I, personally, have resolved to NEVER cheat. I will not even cheat on Solitaire. So, whenever I am faced with a situation where I may believe I can "get away with" cheating, I will not hesitate to decline. This saves me time and keeps me true to myself. This eliminates the fallout of "What if...."

By the same token, you can have a list of things you will ALWAYS do. One of the things I always do is give people the benefit of the doubt. I try to always believe the best motives instigate the behaviors of others. Until someone proves me wrong, I will always believe the best about them. This, too, saves a lot of time.

That being said, NEVER and ALWAYS, while being absolute words, in my system are relative. If I am playing against a cheater, I can use the power of right to prove them wrong. If someone I trust betrays me, I can stop giving them the benefit of the doubt and become wary of them.

This fits in with my belief system and decision making process. There are variables in our dynamic world that need to be taken into account when making our personal lists but notwithstanding, deciding these things beforehand can make us stronger and more effective, giving us more time to focus on other more important things.

Resolutions - Don't Wait for a New Year

A resolve or determination to do something. Firmness of purpose. Why do we need to wait a whole year to make new ones? How about making LIFE resolutions? A mission/purpose/vision/resolve for the rest of your life? 

Top ten lists of new year's resolutions abound. There are many common themes. People want to do better - to BE better. These same people will be making similar resolutions in coming years. 

Why? Because they do not have a plan to maintain the new behaviors. Their "resolutions" are not "firm determination" to accomplish something, but simply "wishful thinking." 


If you want to lose weight, spend more time with family, learn something new or get out of debt,  you need to have a plan of attack. You need to establish new behaviors in your life that don't currently exist. 


How do you make a plan so that your resolutions will stick? Answer some questions, make some lists.


What resources do you need to accomplish your resolution? Do you already have any of them? If not, where will you find these additional resources? What exactly will you do to acquire what you need to succeed? Ask yourself, "Is this something I can continue doing?" 

For instance, if you want to lose weight, you must begin behaving like the thinner person you want to be and continue that behavior for the rest of your life. If you want to get out of debt, you must plan a REASONABLE budget that you can actually follow, while still enjoying life. Think long term and don't wait for the new year. 


Resolve daily to live your new and improved life.