Tell Me Lies

"Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer but wish we didn't." - Erica Jong

How many times have you asked someone what you should do about something when you already knew in the depths of your soul what the correct course of action was? It's actually kind of silly because no matter what anyone says, the facts of the situation will not change. Your true friends will tell you what you know to be the right answers. The ones who don't care will tell you the beautiful lies that your heart craves. 

"Never tell your problems to anyone...20% don't care and the other 80% are glad you have them." - Lou Holtz

Some people revel in the misfortunes of others. Your troubles are fodder for their entertainment. If you are so insecure that you need accolades from the other failures surrounding you, you will get what you deserve. Don't let anyone make you feel less than the beautiful human being you are.

"Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." - Dr. Seuss

When you are authentic, you can be assured that those who stick around are the ones who really care about you.

Personal Resolve - Living Your Beliefs

Do you have a personal list of things you will NEVER do or ALWAYS do?

It's like having a personal mission statement. Everything in your life will fall into a category and can be easily dealt with.

If you know certain things that you will NOT bend on, it will make future decisions EASY. You won't have to labor over decisions if you have a personal resolve. It can be likened to a belief system. If you live in accordance with what you believe in your heart, you will be balanced and live a whole, full life without guilt.

I, personally, have resolved to NEVER cheat. I will not even cheat on Solitaire. So, whenever I am faced with a situation where I may believe I can "get away with" cheating, I will not hesitate to decline. This saves me time and keeps me true to myself. This eliminates the fallout of "What if...."

By the same token, you can have a list of things you will ALWAYS do. One of the things I always do is give people the benefit of the doubt. I try to always believe the best motives instigate the behaviors of others. Until someone proves me wrong, I will always believe the best about them. This, too, saves a lot of time.

That being said, NEVER and ALWAYS, while being absolute words, in my system are relative. If I am playing against a cheater, I can use the power of right to prove them wrong. If someone I trust betrays me, I can stop giving them the benefit of the doubt and become wary of them.

This fits in with my belief system and decision making process. There are variables in our dynamic world that need to be taken into account when making our personal lists but notwithstanding, deciding these things beforehand can make us stronger and more effective, giving us more time to focus on other more important things.

Resolutions - Don't Wait for a New Year

A resolve or determination to do something. Firmness of purpose. Why do we need to wait a whole year to make new ones? How about making LIFE resolutions? A mission/purpose/vision/resolve for the rest of your life? 

Top ten lists of new year's resolutions abound. There are many common themes. People want to do better - to BE better. These same people will be making similar resolutions in coming years. 

Why? Because they do not have a plan to maintain the new behaviors. Their "resolutions" are not "firm determination" to accomplish something, but simply "wishful thinking." 


If you want to lose weight, spend more time with family, learn something new or get out of debt,  you need to have a plan of attack. You need to establish new behaviors in your life that don't currently exist. 


How do you make a plan so that your resolutions will stick? Answer some questions, make some lists.


What resources do you need to accomplish your resolution? Do you already have any of them? If not, where will you find these additional resources? What exactly will you do to acquire what you need to succeed? Ask yourself, "Is this something I can continue doing?" 

For instance, if you want to lose weight, you must begin behaving like the thinner person you want to be and continue that behavior for the rest of your life. If you want to get out of debt, you must plan a REASONABLE budget that you can actually follow, while still enjoying life. Think long term and don't wait for the new year. 


Resolve daily to live your new and improved life.